January 14, 2002

Michael’s Burnt Soup

  1. Begin with soup. I use canned (Health Valley is good), but any kind will do.
  2. Pour the soup into a pot and turn up the flame much higher than necessary.
  3. Do not stir.
  4. Sit at your computer and work on a proposal for a job you really hope you get because you would be perfect for it and would do a fabulous job and the client would love you.
  5. Become so engrossed in your proposal that you fail to notice the burning smell coming from the kitchen, which in your studio apartment is only eight feet behind you.
  6. Finally notice the smell and rush over and turn on the faucet and hold the soup beneath it as a plume of steam shoots up and nearly burns you.
  7. Stir the soup with a large wooden spoon, frequently scraping the bottom of the pot.
  8. Serve with crumbled bits of toast that you over-toasted in the oven because you don’t have a toaster and totally forgot about the toast.