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Phone | Oct 04 2005

It’s interesting that I fall back on writing. Because one thought I have is that writing is bullshit. That’s how it feels: that what I’m writing is bullshit and that writing itself is bullshit—by which I mean, beside the point. Still, what else do I have? This thought occurred to me last night: Even if it’s bullshit, it’s all I have.

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I’ve been trying to write a story and haven’t had much luck. I don’t know if this can be called writer’s block. What exactly is writer’s block? Is it when you write something and it isn’t any good? I think of that as bad writing. Is it when you try to think of something to write and can’t? To me that’s not being able to think of something.

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I held a broken phone to my head and imagined a character in a play who does this. None of the other characters would acknowledge it; it would be this dumb thing he does to get attention.

Ah, but what would happen if a call came in for him on another (real) line. What would he say?

At first I thought he says, “It’s okay, I’ve got it,” but then I realized this is wrong.

He says, “Take a message, I’m on the other line.”