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Toast | Aug 22 2003

This is true, and anyway when have I ever lied to you.

Nine years ago my sister called me in the middle of the night to say she’d met the man of her dreams. My sister normally goes to bed early, so I was forced to take this seriously.

How long had she known him? —About a year.

How had she met him? —At the office; he was dentist (my sister’s a dental hygienist).

When had they started going out? —Two months before.

What had taken so long? —She wasn’t interested.

When did she get interested? —When she cleaned his teeth; he had such excellent oral hygiene. (That last response is a quote; I immediately wrote it in my journal.)

At their wedding, I offered a toast to my brother-in-law’s excellent oral hygiene, which, I explained, had won my sister’s heart. The celebrants, most of whom were either dental professionals or closely related to one, roared their approval. Then my brother-in-law’s father stood and with restrained emotion toasted his son’s childhood orthodontist.

Teary, people were teary.