Skip to primary content

Sweet | Nov 28 2001

Played hide-and-go-seek over Thanksgiving with Rachel’s three youngest nieces, ages five, five, and three. Totally kicked butt.

First round I hid in the utility closet. Little kids don’t like looking in dark places, they’re afraid of the dark, so this keeps them busy a good ten minutes, an eternity in this game. Finally Samantha opens the door, no doubt praying I’m not in there, and I scare her shitless. Last time she looks for me in that closet.

Second round I sit in the living room while they head the way they always head, clockwise from the pantry. Then I sneak back to the pantry (the pantry’s where the “seekers” count while the “hider” hides). Sidney, when she finds me, is like “How the fuck did you do that?” so I’m like, “Fuck if I’m telling.” Without us actually saying anything.

Third round I dominate. First I’m in the middle bedroom, on the top bunk of the bunk beds, behind a bunch of shit that’s up there. The girls come in three, four times, never think to look behind the shit. I wait until they’re out of earshot, then move to the laundry room and from there to the dining room where I sit with Charles, the father of Sidney and Hannah, reading the Wall Street Journal. Hannah, the three-year-old, runs up saying, “Daddy, daddy, help us find Michael,” so I say, “Where have you looked, sweetheart?” and she starts telling me where she’s looked, then realizes, hey, what the fuck? and can’t say anything; she tries but nothing comes out.

Sweet.