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Winner | Nov 15 2001

Some additions to my vocabulary, all from the Alternative English Dictionary:

fuck me harder (idiom): response to an unwanted and undesirable action

fugly (adjective): short for fucking ugly

nooner (noun): 1 sex at noon; usually applies to a man who can’t leave home in the evening; 2 a person involved in a nooner

queef (noun): an expulsion of gas through the vagina

pearl necklace (compound noun): a trail of sperm along one’s neck, suggesting a necklace: “John gave Mary a pearl necklace”

zoom-in (noun): a sudden, unexpected, sometimes unwanted, kiss: “Ew, John kissed me last night; it was a real zoom-in”

A word like zoom-in makes me happy. It’s useful. I knew a guy who did this all the time and was hated for it.

There are many words in the AED I already employ – asswipe, for example, and dickwad; also shitfit (I use shitfit a lot; I enjoy shitfit) and stiffy – so it’s nice seeing them acknowledged. Certainly I could have gotten by without a published definition of dickwad (“someone who acts like a jerk; ‘Eat me%2